For Roy:

It’s been awhile … God, that phrase always reminds me of a terrible corporate rock song from the late ’90s or early ’00s.

I am terribly sick. I am probably going to call it a night after these next few sentences.

That will be a sad endeavor though, for this is the first night I have spent without my girlfriend in a long time.

Granted, we have only been together a month, so “a long time” is relative.

Granted, one of the only reasons I am not over there is because I am deathly ill and her house is less than conducive to my recovery.

She has recently lost power, water and probably her roommates. The place is dark, molding and downright depressing.

It stresses me out. I shouldn’t stress out, but it’s hard when you care for the people in those situations. I wish I could make it better — maybe with the magic wand trick. Perhaps, some shitty Harry Potter spell.

She has so much other shit going down right now as well. Sometimes I wonder if I brought all this upon her, but I know it’s irrational. All of these things had been accumulating. It was just strange timing.

I have told people lately that it feels like a dozen Dr. Scholl’s are flopping around in my head and slapping the back of my eyes. I took some Mucinex today and it made me feel like I had no throat or chest, yet those parts still ached — an invisible, phantom ache. My nasal passages are clogged and it feels like my head has ballooned twice its normal size. My muscles feel like I just ran a marathon, although all I have done today is stay and bed and mosey about town a bit.

The show was last night. It was the first real show for both of my bands. I was really sick then too, but I tried to hide it. My shitty punk band, Iconicons, did fine for a first performance. Making Eyes (my other band) showcased a new song where each member sings a verse and chorus. The bands made $12 total.

Yeah, we go for the big bucks.

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~ by shawp on October 17, 2008.

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